The decision to adopt instead of having my own baby

I really tried not to worry much about getting pregnant during the Christmas season. The reason for that is because I was so busy. Not only was Christmas coming, but I did 3 or 4 craft shows during that time too! I was running here and there making cards and advent calendars. All of that busyness (is that a word?) helped me keep busy and not worry. We told my parents and Bobby's parents what our plan was. They were excited for us of course. The Waechtler's will now have 41 grandchildren and my family will have 5 (yes all five are from me :) ). We only told Peter and Tiffani from the Waechtler side. We just figured they would all find out soon enough. Something happened at the Waechtler family Christmas party that was funny though. Mary said to me, "what ya giving to Bobby for Christmas, a baby?" I thought someone had told her so I said "Mary, Shhh!!" Apparently no one had told her she just said it to be funny. By my reaction she knew it was true. She was also excited for us, probably because she has 8 kids.

Michael and Christina got married on Dec. 26th. We went to the temple for the wedding that day. Bobby had to work nights so we were just home that night. I felt a distinct impression that I should figure everything out. I wanted to pray to make sure we were supposed to go through the surgery. Bobby's surgery was scheduled for Jan. 15th and so I wanted to make sure that was the path we supposed to take. So I prayed about it. My answer was NOT to do the surgery. Immediately I was so confused. So then I prayed again to see what we were supposed to do. The answer was to adopt. WOW, WHAT!!?? It took me days to wrap my brain around being pregnant again and now we are supposed to adopt. I actually felt some instant relief because some of the things I would have to worry about were gone like no maternity clothes, no finding a new doctor, no getting fat. I also thought how nice it would be to enjoy a baby without all the emotional feelings that come after having it. That will be different!!

I have to be honest here. Fear set in big time again!! I know NOTHING about adoption and all the ins and outs. I felt like I should call my best friend from High School. Becky was only able to have 1 child but has adopted 2 so I figured she would know what to do. I was right she talked me through both of her situations. She told me about Fost to adopt and I knew right on the phone that was what we were supposed to do. I knew there was a child out there that needed our family and this was where we were going to find him/her. She warned me about telling everyone my plans because everyone has their opinions and it is not always positive, especially concerning foster care. That night was New Years Eve and so we went to play games with some friends. Sure enough, my friends had a lot to say on the subject. They brought up stuff that I was already worried about and wanted to know how I would deal with it, etc., etc., and I couldn't defend myself (and Bobby was at work that night). I came home discouraged and scared.

The next day I was reading the weekly reading assignment and here is an excerpt from what I wrote on my private blog.


A continuation of the last post Jan. 2, 2010
I figured out why I as feeling so overwhelmed with everything. Sat. night I decided to read in the scriptures. I read Moses 1 because that was our reading assignment for the week. When I did I realized what had happened to me was the same thing that happened to Moses. I had this spiritual experience where HF was telling me what I should do. Immediately after that Satan was there to tempt me and make me feel like I wasn't a good mom. He was there to tell me I couldn't do it. Now that I realize that that was what I was feeling I am ok now. Here is what I have learned so far. I must have patience and trust the Lord. I lack both of those things. I also learned that I don't need to tell everyone my plans for my life. It is my life and everyone has their opinion and I don't need to hear all of their opinions. We are going to pursue the Fost to adopt program and see where that takes us. I feel good about that decision.


So.... what next? We called the Foster Care foundation and got that ball rolling. The first thing they did was send us information via email. Everything sounded ok with us when we read the papers. Then they came to visit us on Jan. 28th. I found out that day that we had to take Foster Care classes. Each class is 4 hours long and they were in Brigham City. That means I would be gone 5 hours every Tuesday and Thursday for the whole month of February. That was overwhelming to me. I had to take all 8 classes to get licensed and Bobby had to take 3 now and the rest within a year. It was a good thing he only had to take that many because he had to work on most of those nights. Here are all the other things we had to do:

*Physical exams for both of us (poor Bobby has been over examined lately!!! :)) (we did cancel the surgery so at least he didn't have to do that :) )
* Background checks
* Fingerprints
* Forms, forms and more forms to fill out.

Has anyone been wondering what we've been doing in February? Well we have mostly just been attending classes and filling out paper work!!!